I had become a Christian at age 10 and had lived an active, committed Christian life. Upon graduation from high school, I elected to commute to the local state university (the College-Conservatory of Music at the University of Cincinnati). Though my older brother had gone to a Christian college, I knew the local university was the right place for me.
But there I began questioning my belief in the Bible and in God Himself. All the miracle stories now seemed far-fetched. So for the first two years of college, I was a sincere atheist, even though I continued to attend church and even directed the youth choir.
Over time, my intellectual struggle came to a stalemate. I realized that scientific reasoning alone couldn’t tell me whether there was a God. My mind and my senses were too limited, too small. There was so much I couldn’t observe and couldn’t know. But at that point I became convinced that God was real because I had seen Him in the lives of my parents and in many other Christians I had known.
So on that basis, without any emotional crisis, I recommitted myself to God. I have trusted and followed Him since, even through many dark and difficult times. I have never again had any doubts about His existence.
Irrefutable rational proof for God – or disproof – simply wasn’t available. In my opinion, it never is. Though faith in Him is totally reasonable, His reality cannot be proved purely by human observation and reasoning. We are tiny, brief, creatures of dust. He is an unbounded, eternal, Spirit being. Faith, not reason, is His chosen pathway to relationship with Him. He is not seeking people smart enough to perceive Him. He is seeking people humble enough to trust Him.
